Pete

Pete’s Story - Supporting a Father of Twins with Complex Needs

When Pete was first referred to the Dads Rock worker by his Health Visitor, he was a father living on the edge of exhaustion. Raising four-year-old twins who are both on the Autism spectrum, Pete and his wife navigate two entirely different worlds of care every day. Their son, J, attends an additional needs nursery and lives with pica—a condition requiring Pete to be "on alert" every waking second to ensure his son's safety. Their daughter, R, attends a mainstream nursery and faces her own unique developmental challenges.

For Pete, the pressure wasn't just physical; it was systemic. Between working full-time and managing the complex medical needs of his children, his nights were defined by hyper-vigilance. Even with the help of prescribed Melatonin for J, Pete found himself unable to truly rest, staying awake to monitor R and the household. This chronic sleep deprivation was compounded by the "assessment merry-go-round"—a repetitive cycle of meetings and evaluations for two different children that often felt like performing for assessors rather than receiving actual help.

The Health Visitor recognized that Pete was bottling up the weight of these responsibilities and he desperately needed support.

Our Dads worker stepped in to provide that support and Pete was finally able to speak openly about the toll the double administrative burden was taking on his mental health. After their first meeting, Pete messaged the worker: “Thank you very much for our chat today. It helped a lot.”

Pete meets our Dads Worker every week - it’s a time just to be himself and chat about anything and everything. It is the only space in his life where he is not a carer, an employee, or an advocate, but simply himself. Through this consistent, non-judgmental support, Pete has moved from merely surviving to actively managing his wellbeing.

With the guidance of our Dads Worker, Pete has begun navigating the complexities of respite care and sleep support with renewed confidence. Most importantly, he has recognized the necessity of his own health in the family equation; acting on our advice, Pete recently took a necessary leave of absence from work to focus on his recovery. By supporting the father, Dads Rock has stabilised the foundation of the entire family, ensuring Pete has the resilience to continue showing up for J and R.

(*Names of those involved have been changed)